Fear of sharing

I’ve talked about this before and I have thought a bit about our fears of sharing dreams. In a lot of societies that share information in the way we do, we get this feeling about each bit of information we ingest. We don’t always have to believe it’s a true feeling to have, it’s still there. In the life !of information it’s our feelings and anthropomorphic model of the medium of that information that sets up how we digest it. I’ll show you what I mean.

Imagine that WordPress was a person. What do they look like? What do they wear? What does this tell you about the information WordPress tells you?

Do this again for another source of information, say Twitter. Again does this anthropomorphic model tell us about this medium?

We do this a lot as humans. We create identified models of things we interact with. Some become universal characters whom we share our daily lives with.

To me WordPress is the girl in highschool whose on the magazine, sharing everything she can with everyone. She cares so much about her little articles. Each one is a little pearl. You know sometimes it’s not the best, but you pay attention to it as most of the time it’s a pretty awesome magazine.

Twitter is a group of friends at a table, each talk about something they care and observe. I’m in this conversation as well. Every person can join this group but I have some favorites whom I keep together with. Every now and again we get together and share something really important, but mostly it’s just the thoughts and feelings about today’s stuff.

What does this have to do with dreams? Well one of these mediums is what we call common knowledge or common sense. If they were a person they would be the slightly dodgy guy who sometimes tells you silly bits of stuff that might be true but sometimes isn’t. It’s often very convincing so you listen to him as he’s your elder. One day maybe he says something that everyone seems to believe. Like our dreams are things people can tease us about if we share them. We can be hurt by this as they tell us our dreams are nuts. We are crazy and need to seek proper phychology all consulting. Secretly we believe we do.

This is now what we feel when we think of sharing our dreams. We get scared of being accused of being crazy. We don’t want other people to know we secretly feel like we are the only ones who are actually genuinely insane.

I will share something with you now.

This was me too.

I believed I was nuts because of my dream content.

I dreamed about becoming a girl. I wanted to be one so bad I was a girl in pretty much every dream I had. Mostly I ignored it. Or when it really made me feel bad I told my diary.

I did start to get over some of this fear. I found out that gender swapping dreams are pretty common.
It was my fears that stopped me from sharing them with anyone.

Transgender people don’t get a good wrap in the media. In the 90s the bad press around them was pretty saturating. There was however one moment that stands out for me.

Ace Ventura

This movie is rife with transphobic messages. I was horrified in my little teenage self I would be treated like the trans woman in this movie. People out to proove in every possible way I wasn’t a “real woman”, and never could be.

It pretty much set me back about 15 years. I was just staring to properly question my gender. The context of the medium, a movie, helped clinch the message home. Being transgender wasn’t a good thing. Of course I now know it to be a bunch of shit attempt at horrid comedy designed by a immature fuckwhit (not sorry). That being said it gets my point accross, the medium changes how we interpret and analyze our message. Our own personal dream medium is no different.

Not all transgender people have gender swapping dreams of course. In most of my dreams gender isn’t even a factor. Others it’s the main element. And it’s completely fine for it to be so.

There are a lot of people who ask me if any particular topic in a dream is normal. I have to say again, normal is a concept. It’s another one of these media we humans have created. My normal is vastly different to the normal of a Kenyan boy in his early teens, as an extreme example. My normal is also different from the guy in a business suit sitting across from me on the buss.

Being worried about dream content is kindof normal, as long as it doesn’t cause you anxiety or insomnia or fear of sleep etc. In those cases seek help.
Otherwise normal is just a word.

The medium of dreams should be as free and unfearfull as possible, and if others make you scared of sharing your dreams, they are not the people to share dreams with.

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